Saturday 29 December 2012

Waiting for Sunrise

The night isn't black. It is filled with all sorts of different colours, blues, greens, oranges, purples, pinks... virtually the entire spectrum. I learnt this in Art lessons at school when the teacher forbade us to use black when painting a night time skyline. I looked at the night time differently after that. I began to see the blues, and the oranges and the beauty of it. The shimmering of the stars, the glow of the moon, even the shadows of the clouds. It was all different. It became something a little less scary. (That's right I am a little afraid of the dark)

I think of how pain and sorrow are often described as "darkness" or "night"... like the lyrics "There maybe pain in the night but joy comes in the morning." I believe that even though things can seem bleak and even though you might feel hopeless and alone, the night need not be as intimidating or isolating as it seems. Pain teaches us lessons and builds our strength. It shows us who our real friends are and teaches us to value life and its happier times. These happier times show us that we can get through the tough ones, that there is always hope and always something to hold on for.

The "darkness," however, can be a very real and a very frightening place. It can make you feel cold, isolated and alone, even if you're surrounded by those most precious to you. It can make you introspective and despairing. It can make you feel small and insignificant. The pain can destroy you if you let it. It breaks your heart and forces loneliness upon you. It can make you feel like you're clutching at straws just to hold on. And that feels horrible. It feels lonely.

I seek help and solace in Jesus. He is my strength when I have none. He is my rock when I am simply sand, being washed away with the tides. Yes, I still feel low sometimes, and yes it is difficult to feel happy sometimes, but I have a hope. And as long as that hope exists, I can see the beauty within the night. I can begin to seek the colour and the brightness of the skies, as I wait for sunrise, rather than the bleakness of the dark and the cold which seem to trap me.

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