Then you have the mind. Brilliantly logical, inexplicably clever, and yet it can twist our perspectives and turn the table on our emotions in seconds. It is also essential to keeping us alive. It is linked to every single part of our body, including the heart and yet the two things can be in complete contradiction to each other. The body amazes me and the power of the mind and the passion of the heart amaze me more still.
During my time in Montpellier I had a revelation of love, and what it means. I had once again begun to believe that love didn't hold a lot of power and that it was an overused word, thrown around by hopeless romantics like myself. I was taking love for granted. I am reminded of the passage in 1 Corinthians. It was read out at my Grandma's funeral a couple of years ago, and I think of her when I hear it. She was gentle, kind and loving, but she was also fiery, passionate and independent. She was by no means a wishy-washy soppy Christian, but a strong woman of God who took no rubbish from anyone, and treated everyone with love and respect. I also used to think that the passage made love sound soppy, but actually if you consider the qualities of love, it is something remarkable and extremely powerful.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices in the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8How many times have you been impatient? How many times have you let pride get in the way? How many times have you held onto what others have done wrong? How many times have you found pleasure in someone else's pain? How many times have you been hurt by someone you love? I read these few verses and I realise that I have probably been all of the things that love is not. I realise that if I have love, then these characteristics will come too. And there is immense power in that. The power is the ability to see past fear, failure, imperfection and jealousy and to love not because of these things, but in spite of them. It says in the bible that God IS love. This means that despite all of these mistakes and all of the ways I have fallen short, God has met me. He has made me his child and embraces me, as I am and without any need for perfection. He protects me.
Even though I make mistakes, even though I have made him angry and jealous by turning my back, he is a graceful and merciful father whose love for me is wild and completely fierce. In Hosea, God loved his people in such a fierce way, that their betrayal created a passionate, violent anger.
"Like a bear robbed of her cubs, I will attack them and rip them open. Like a lion I will devour them; a wild animal will tear them apart." Hosea 13:8This seems really bleak, and I struggled to reach the end of the book. But God told me to keep reading. Every so often, amongst the pain and anger were promises that would give me hope and relieve the sense of fear that the betrayal had created. A relief, because I would be able to return to him and call him husband instead of master (Hosea 2:16). He would call me his "loved one." He will promise me to him forever, and he will always love me. He wouldn't do this because of something I'd done, but because of his mercy. He would do this because he is love. God is the embodiment of love and a demonstration of the power that comes with it. And that same God loves me.
It is too easy for us to forget that this is the case, and for our mind to distort our perspective, and embitter our hearts. But if we can take the truth to heart then lies cannot harm us and they will not move us because we have been secured in the arms of God, as his beautiful, perfect children.
