Tuesday, 24 April 2012

"I love you"

He watches her struggle through the day, barely able to stand at the end of it. He can see her soul is weary. He can see she is tired, tired of everything. But she has turned her back. It breaks his heart. She has distanced herself from him, because it makes it easier to pretend she is fine and makes it easier for her to survive the day. He can see what she tries to conceal. He sees it and it hurts him. It hurts him to see how she is crushed by the weight of shame she doesn't need, and how she is once again imprisoned in the cage that he released her from. The door is open, she is free. But she can't see it. She can't see beyond herself. She can't see beyond a single day. He is calling her, he is seeking her, but she can't see him. She doesn't want to see him, because she can't cope with the shame she carries.

She collapses. Exhausted, she slumps into the corner and curls into a ball. The tears begin to fall. She has finally allowed herself to break. She has finally accepted that she can't do this alone. She cries out to God and he is there. His gentle hand wipes away the tears one by one. She looks up at him and realises that he still loves her. Even though he knows what she did. He loves her.

"I forgive you. My child, I forgive you. I love you. Do you not see that?"

She could see it, but she couldn't bear to. It was too beautiful and heartbreaking because, still the guilt haunted her. She clung to him with all she had left and sobbed. He held her there, wiping away the tears until the last one fell. He dried her eyes and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. 

"You are beautiful, my daughter. You are everything to me. I have always loved you and I will love you forever."

He still loved her. She couldn't believe it. She loved him too. More than anyone in the universe. She wiped her eyes and gazed up at him. 

"I love you," she whispered. "I love you more than anything." 

His heart sung. She loved him. She still loved him. She wanted him. She hungered for his love, and she was His.

He was the only one who made her whole. He was the only one who could set her free. She found refuge and strength in his presence. Could he help her to see her true worth? Could he help her to escape the prison she created? She needed him. Now more than ever. She began to have hope. She knew it would not be in vein. When had he left her side? When had he turned his back? Never. It was she who had lost hope. It was she who had lost faith. It was he who restored her each and every time she fell. It was he who took her back each and every time she strayed. And she still couldn't believe her guilt had been washed away. She still couldn't believe she was as precious gold and not tarnished copper to Him. She would never be able to comprehend this truth, but she began to rejoice in it and the burden began to ease. She will face this, she will get through it and she will cling to the strength and light of her perfect Father; The one who will keep her safe in his embrace for all of time.

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