Dreams, ambitions and little things.

I had two of my closest friends round for dinner one evening before I came home for the summer. It was a brilliant opportunity to catch up and possibly one of my favourite evenings of this year. We were just girls, discussing hopes, dreams, the big things, the little things and everything in between. And somehow we got onto the topic of our dreams for the future. I was talking about a writing competition and debating about whether or not I should enter it, and my friend asked "If you could do anything in the whole world, would you write?" I looked at her and thought about it for a minute. If  I didn't have to get a "real job" I would write. I would have a study with a beautiful view and a sleek beautiful machine to write on (alongside the obligatory writer's notebook and a beautiful Parker pen). I would write about the things that I know, the things I love, the things I hate and everything in between. If I could do anything with my life it would be that. I would use my writing to encourage others, to tell them things which aren't necessarily talked about over the dinner table. I want to paint vivid pictures with my words and create entire universes with a million different combinations of 26 letters.

Writing is freedom; the freedom to escape, the freedom to become immersed in a whole other world, the freedom to become someone different and the freedom to express what you can't necessarily say aloud. Writing gives you a voice. Writing is a power which I am in awe of. It allows you to do so many different things and become so many different people. It speaks so loudly and eloquently of what the heart feels, yet without the nervous stammers and stutters, and stumbling over words that seem to occur so frequently in speech. It builds and it destroys. It hurts and it heals. Writing is incredible. And if you love it, if you nurture it you will discover its power.

But this is where I paused to think. Ever since that evening I have been challenged. Why can't I just write? Why can't I chase the thing I am most passionate about? What is stopping me?

If you love something. Chase it. Go after it. Don't spend life regretting those chances you never took and those dreams you let die because the fear of falling prevented you from trying. How do you know what it's like to fly if you don't take the leap?

Courage: Find Your Voice

Life is scary. Life is a rollercoaster of emotions, ups and downs and twists and turns, and it's the wildest ride we'll ever take. And whilst there are plenty of beautiful moments and a few of real ecstasy, often, in order to get to that point, we have to experience moments of gut wrenching fear. Sometimes, that fear isn't even in the big things, it can be in the tiny things too. But strangely enough, in those moments of fear, in those moments where the million what ifs course through your mind, sometimes those are where we find our greatest courage. In those moments, we can find the ability to speak out and to be heard.

A number of people have told me over the years that I am brave. Honestly, it isn't the first characteristic that comes to my head when I go to describe my personality. On reflection, maybe, just maybe, those people are right. Despite the fact that I am scared of a lot of things (both superficial and deeper rooted fears) sometimes I can summon up that little bit of courage. And at the time I don't necessarily feel brave (in fact I mostly felt stupid) but I would feel like what I have done is right. And that bravery has taught me a lot; and though it hasn't always yielded results, it has strengthened me. That's what courage does. It builds strength. Courage is associated with strong people. And they aren't courageous because they're strong, but they have been made strong because they have been courageous.